things i bought with money to survive

garage sale

today i went to a garage sale that was across the road from my apartment.
the house had a sign - 'sat sun garage sale here' - without any punctuation.
i walked into someone's front yard, and picked things up and asked them how much they were worth to them. And they told me, and some things i decided weren't worth that to me, and so i put them back.
Other things were worth what they said. One was a giant orange and black jumper. i asked the lady how much and she told me and then said 'its a classic, my husband used to wear that' and i bought it and went home, across the street, and tried it on, and wanted to wear it out but didn't because i couldn't help feeling her husband was dead, or had left her for someone else and me wearing her worthless or priceless husband's, worthless or priceless orange and black hoodie, up and down the street was kind of indiscreet.

so i didn't wear it - i wore something else.
they will have more stuff out tommorrow maybe. i might go back.

things that are next to my bed

obviously i am super hip and cool.
that is knitting in the bag, if you cant tell.

this I made and ate for breakfast

i made all this in just 7 minutes - it was my pre-exam meal.
it doesn't look as good as it was. which was very.

this is how holly and ruby show me that they haven't forgotten me.

they send me all types of things.
some aren't on the wall, or this wall at least.


they are nice to me those two.

here's this

Jabber IM with RUBY CELESTE RUFF-LANDER <**********@gmail.com>22/06/09 11:17 PM

hey lovley!
hi sweety!
whats doing on the lower east side?
got up early for once and i'm finally going to a kind of supermarket - they don't really have them here- for the first time so i can stop starving!
they don;t have supermarkets?
not really, just many many corner store delis where you have to ask for the butter and stuff - random
thats still cool
what they do do good is cheap hot and tasty snaks that aren't half bad - much better than in aust where everything is no less than 8 bucks
hey sorry i couldn't talk on sunday was making mum and dad cupcakes
did they like them?
yes loved em ...its just hit me that they will be gone too in a couple of months
IN a couple?when do they leave?
august 19
yeah, but just think - then it's only a few months till we are all reunited!!!
yeah - but its just such shit timing. everyone is gone at one - it is ridiculous
i'm thinking that my $$$ will be totally drained by jan, and i might spend 3 weeksaround bankok
really not going comming to have new years in gay paris?
ofcourse!! no i mean after you depart! yeah, it was just a thought - that or i come home for summer - which could also be great!
you could come home ith meeee! i could bring you hoooome!
when do yuo leave for aust again?
before the 29th of jan
why?
wedding
rrrright
rrrrrright yourself - you making fun?
maybe but yeah - looks like you will be bringing me home .
but i don't want to bring you home and you to be all ''waaaah australia sucks, i wish i was overseas again, i don;t want to go back' becuase then i leabe you in bangers!
do you want to come to bangers? before the wedding?you might get bored of gay pari!?
perhaps but proooooblyz not!

it's so weird being here - and having to have purpose every day.
yeah having a purpose is boring when you have to have one then cruitial when your just existing
please graffiti that ll over the city

this is my life right now

and that's my lunch on the heater.

these are pictures of things

things that happened on my way home.

i walked home tonight.
i arrived home at 1.00am
the time is now 1.09am.
here is what happened on my walk.


i exited the apartment building through the front door.
i walked one way, thinking that it would take me home and then stopped.
i looked the other way and decided the other way was the way which would lead to my home.
i walked until i heard the beach then turned left.
i walked up a bit, till i came to a corner i didn't recognise, then turned right, just to turn left again.
as i walked down Wiora st i saw a figure walking towards me on my side of the street.
the figure moved slowly and i could tell it was a boy with deadlocks because of the way the light lit him from behind.
i saw he was staggering and moving more side to side than he was forwards.

as i approached him i saw he was about the same height as me.
he staggered side to side, forward. Side to side, forward.
as i passed him, feeling superior in my strictly forward motion, i whispered ' everything will be okay'.
he stopped.
i kept walking, passed another pedestrian, then looked back.
he was still stopped.
i kept walking and two police cars wizzed past, down Wiora, right onto Blair.
i looked back and the boy with the dreadlocks was still standing there.

for a second i throught about going back to make sure he was okay - but before i knew it i was home.

i'm sure he started moving again, and went back to where he lived, and sat down and thought about what just happened.
i'm sure that when he did, he would have realized that everything really would be okay.

or maybe he's still standing there.
who knows.

Things i thought i have already written

Does You Inspire You - Chairlift.
track 2 - planet health.

listen to it.

have i already written this?
this feels like deja-vu.